I clung to a rope and felt my body heaved up and down. Up and down. In the midst of the motion, I felt almost weightless. Somewhere between the up and the down, I was really defying gravity, flying, eternally falling. My hair had escaped its loose braid, of course, as I knew it would, and I let it whip across my face. It made me feel like an old-movie heroine to stand there like that on the prow of the great ship. It was romantic and foreign. Standing still, my hand wrapped around a length of rope attached to some important rigging, my feet braced apart, my hair whipping as it tends to do in high wind, my eyes fixed on the hidden horizon, I was a princess. Or perhaps a lovely captive. There was no difference on a pirate ship.
Tobias picked up a clean towel from some drawer and tossed it to me. Taking one for himself, he kicked off his rain boots and peeled off his wet shorts and boxers. I licked my lips again and ran the dry towel over my body mindlessly. I had been wanting him for days, ever since I watched him beat that poor young man, the previous owner of the ship we now rode in. Tobias had punched and kicked, the whole time wearing an angelic smile on his face. It scared me and enthralled me and enticed me so deeply that my womb tickled with anticipation. I squeezed my thighs tightly together while the other man cried and whimpered.
“Please,” he had begged. “We haven’t done anything wrong.” It had been a pathetic plea. I covered my mouth with my fingers and giggled. Tobias glanced at me. I tried to make my plain brown eyes as seductive as possible. I bit my lip. But he looked away again and reached for a slender knife from the drawer. The man became hysterical. Mathias took a length of rope and helped tie him down. Then Tobias took to work. Mathias. Tobias. Slow cuts were made. Some were deep. Some were shallow. Some drew so much blood that I wanted to cover my hands in it and decorate the ship.
It was a massive vessel. It had taken twelve crewmembers to run it. The boys dispatched them fairly quickly. Plop. One fell overboard. Plop, plop. Two more until they were all gone except for the man and his wife. Then we gunned the ship and left their servants behind out in open sea. I wondered if we should have killed them first but I liked their screams. Their desperation made me envious. They loved life.
The remnants of blood were still visible on the wood in the cabin. Bloody footsteps streaked all along the aisle. Small bloody handprints lovingly adorned the ship. Those were mine.
The woman had been much more weepy but Mathias had taken care of her. In front of her husband, he tied her slowly to the bed. He whispered in her ear. I knew what he was saying. I closed my eyes and pretended Tobias was saying them to me. The woman only cried harder and louder but I whimpered in anticipated ecstasy. Mathias took of her clothes. She was beautiful. I was suddenly glad that it was not Tobias on that bed. I knew I would have been too jealous and would have torn through her like a harpie. But I could enjoy this.
Her husband had already been cut up by then. We had left him immobile on the floor, sitting up to watch his wife’s final performance. We did not gag him. The more sound, the better. Tobias, finished with his part of the job, went up top to take care of keeping us on course. My part was yet to come.
Mathias took the woman’s clothes off gently. As I watched, my eyes glazed over and suddenly it was me on that bed with Tobias looming over me. I clenched and unclenched my hands, reveling in the sharpness of the rope cutting into my wrists. Tobias smiled. He leaned down and kissed my cheekbone. He took a sharp knife and cut slits down my clothing. Then one by one, he peeled each piece off as though he was unwrapping a present. Slowly, carefully. He took in the sight and smiled.
Leaning into my ear, he whispered, “You’re so beautiful, baby. I’m going to touch you all over. It will feel wonderful. I’ll like it too. I promise. I know you’ll be good, like you should be.” I strained slightly against my restraints. He liked that. Then he lowered his mouth onto my nipple and sucked, softly at first then harder. I inadvertently arched up against him while at the same time trying to pull away. He lifted his head and then took the other nipple into his mouth.
The husband’s shouts tore me out of my daze. Tears streamed down his face to mix with the blood as he watched Mathias on top of his wife. But I saw a bulge in his pants and I knew. I laughed out loud and Mathias laughed too. Still, he didn’t take his eyes off of his prize. I stared off again and tried to reclaim my moment.
Tobias was on top of me. He looked back and drew a finger across my heaving chest. I couldn’t seem to breathe properly. Perhaps I was too excited. His finger trailed down, down, down. He found the juncture between my legs and I let out a whimper. My legs, bound in more rope so that I was spread-eagled on the bed, wriggled and writhed. Tobias held my face firmly in his hands and put his forehead against mine.
“I’ll make you like it,” he promised in a whisper. Then he plunged down. His tongue worked the hairless outer skin. It tickled and terrified me. Wetness seemed to drip out of me like water. Drip. Drip. Drip. He lapped it up thirstily. Then his tongue was inside me. It darted in and out slowly, tasting. I couldn’t help it. He was making me ready.
He lifted his head. His hard muscles contracted as he kneeled in front of me in all his naked glory. He was a splendid display of a man. He inched closer on his knees and positioned himself at my opening.
“Ready?” he asked. I shook my head a little, my eyes wide. Then he entered me with one long thrust. He was not a quiet one either. As soon as he was inside me, he let out a maniacal whoop. I cried out. It hurt. But I could not stop my movements. From afar, I looked to be struggling but it was only against my own inhibitions. I wanted to participate but the sight of him took my breath away. He pumped into me and out of me, each time returning with such force that I almost hit my head on the wall.
“Oh god, oh god, oh god,” he said over and over. “You’re so tight, my wonderful woman. My wonderful, my lovely. You like it, don’t you? Oh of course you do, yes. I know. I know. I know! How about this? Do you like this too?” He put his hands under me and lifted me up to match his thrust. I cried out as the ropes dug deeper into my skin but I couldn’t fight him. I wanted this.
More and more. He never seemed to tire. Finally, it happened. His face contorted and turned slightly red and he grit his teeth. Then he thrust into me one last time. I felt a warm liquid fill my insides. He released me and I fell onto the bed with his seed seeping out of me, little by little. I was exhausted. I coughed a little and whimpered mindlessly. My head rolled to one side.
“No! No! No!” The man pulled me out of my dream again. But I was satisfied. Sitting on the opposite bunk, watching Mathias with his new woman, I knew she felt the same too. Her husband sobbed angrily and tried to curse Mathias. The spit dripping from his mouth made him look mad. Mathias finally stood from the bed. Sweat glistened all over his body. He was magnificent. Still naked, he knelt by the husband and slapped him a little.
“Coward,” he spat. He considered the man’s face, torn and bruised and bloody. He leaned forward and licked his cheek. The man tried to pull away but he was too weak. A strange look came over Mathias’s face.
“Oh, you poor thing,” he said. “You must be so tired. But you know it will be all right now. You weren’t worthy of her, and now I’ll take care of her. You know that.” He gently brushed his fingers through the man’s bloody hair. “You can go now,” he said to him.
The man shook his head, words of denial forming on his lips.
“I’ll take good care of her and us. I promise. Her and us.” Mathias wrapped his big hands around the man’s neck and squeezed. Mathias’s new woman wriggled on the bed, perhaps in an attempt to stop Mathias. But I knew what she was really feeling. She had known a real man’s embrace now. Her movements were nothing more than an encouragement for Mathias, cheering him on to show the other poor man the final act of mercy. And he did. The man’s eyes rolled up into his head with a gag and he slumped to the ground.
That was how it had been. Now, three days later, I stared at Tobias’s back. I wanted him to take me like Mathias had taken that woman, the way I had imagined it. But he would not, probably. He would not take the woman either. She only belonged to one man now. I pulled myself out of my reverie, sighed and took my wet clothes off. Tobias looked up.
“What’s with you, mermaid?” he asked as he donned some of the other man’s clean clothes.
I simply looked at him and without a word, crawled into the bunk next to the bound form of the other woman. In a few minutes, I was asleep.
* * *
Tobias and Mathias were clever brothers. Within a few more weeks, they had completely changed the color of the ship and taken off down the coast. The name was different too. Something dry, simple, unmemorable. When we needed it, they anchored a mile off shore and I took the little rescue boat to small towns to get supplies. Food, clothing, medicine, blankets, more towels.
The weather was much warmer. I love June. It makes me think of tsunamis and fresh burials. Back on land, I would frequent the local graveyard to watch funerals. They were wonderful. It was then that people loved you best. I looked forward to my own.
Close to dinner-time, Mathias came into the kitchen of the ship. He was excited. Without saying a word, he nodded to us and turned back to the sleeping quarters. Tobias and I looked at each other, not having started our meals, and dashed from the table.
On one of the larger beds, Mathias’s new woman was grunting and breathing hard. The large swelling on top of her seemed about to bust. She cried out and leaned forward with her knees pulled up close to her. I grabbed several clean towels from the cabinet and dropped them beside her. Hot water. Perhaps some needles and thread, just in case. Mathias and Tobias stood back. It was their right. Tobias had gotten her to us and Mathias had worked tirelessly every day for the first month with her. This was my job now.
“Be careful, Maria,” Mathias warned. I gave him a sweet smile and kissed his cheek. Then I leaned in front of the woman.
“Be ready to push, now, you thing,” I said as nicely as I could. She screamed and gripped the sheets beneath her. It dawned on me that she looked so much more comfortable now with only the hand restraints.
I spread her legs hard and she cursed. I laughed and looked at Mathias. His face beamed with joy. Peering into her, I saw a hardness where softness should have been. I fingered it and she cringed.
“I think it’s coming!” I exclaimed. “Now, push!” She did as I said and the hardness came a little closer. “Push, I said!” and I slapped her knee. She pushed again.
She had been heaving like this for days now. Mathias had decided it was best to let the thing run its course. They aren’t very good when rushed.
“Push,” I commanded. “Again! Again! Again!” She pushed and pushed and finally exclaimed loudly. Then she leaned back against the bed again and a higher-pitched cry filled the room. I caught the bouncing thing in my hands and slapped it, just for fun. Putting it on the floor before me, I took a piece of string and tied off its chord. Then using the knife we had used on the woman’s old mate, I cut it. I was pleased to see there was still crusted blood on its hilt and edge. I handed the crier to my brother and Mathias lifted it in his arms.
“Hello, ugly nephew,” Tobias said. I felt proud of my little family and wondered then why I had ever thought to jump over in a storm. Shortly after, more fluids came out of the woman. But she was already asleep, tired after her job.
My brothers and I took the crier up to the top of the deck.
“What will you name him?” I asked Mathias.
“Jonas,” he said. I frowned but Tobias laughed out loud.
“He did come out of a whale!” Tobias shouted. He had always thought that Mathias’s new woman was too big for his taste. Mathias tossed the crier to me and proceeded to chase our brother around the top of the boat. Presently, I took the crier back down to Mathias’s woman, whom we had named Gladys. I forced Jonas to her breast and slapped her hand away when she tried to touch him. He did not belong to her, after all.
Her face was certainly strained. She was both disgusted and curious by the thing sucking heartily on her nipple, just as Mathias had done. She almost wanted to love it, I could tell. But that was not her job. When Jonas was finished, I wrapped him up and put him in the bathroom sink. He would not fall out of there. I went back to Gladys and sat beside her. She was still sweaty and bloody all over, partly from the birth and partly from her old husband.
I curled up beside her. “He’s fine. Very fine. Mathias is pleased,” I remarked. She said nothing so I went on. “Don’t worry, you won’t be alone long. We typically wait another month or so.”
She made an odd movement. “For what?” she asked.
“For another one, of course. Mathias won’t leave you alone for long. And when he’s not here, I’ll keep you company.” I leaned up and smiled at her. Then I growled and made a ferocious face. She cried out and pulled away. I laughed. She was so fun to tease.
“Maybe Tobias will give me one too,” I mused. She grimaced and I slapped her face. “I would certainly please my brother better than you pleased Mathias!” She said nothing but a tear slid down her face. I rolled my eyes. What a sack, I thought.
Bored, I got up and headed towards the top of the ship again where I could still hear my brothers running after each other. They were really children at heart.
“I hope you keep your milk up,” I said coldly over my shoulder, before I left her. “What with all of us, you’re going to need it.”
Tobias picked up a clean towel from some drawer and tossed it to me. Taking one for himself, he kicked off his rain boots and peeled off his wet shorts and boxers. I licked my lips again and ran the dry towel over my body mindlessly. I had been wanting him for days, ever since I watched him beat that poor young man, the previous owner of the ship we now rode in. Tobias had punched and kicked, the whole time wearing an angelic smile on his face. It scared me and enthralled me and enticed me so deeply that my womb tickled with anticipation. I squeezed my thighs tightly together while the other man cried and whimpered.
“Please,” he had begged. “We haven’t done anything wrong.” It had been a pathetic plea. I covered my mouth with my fingers and giggled. Tobias glanced at me. I tried to make my plain brown eyes as seductive as possible. I bit my lip. But he looked away again and reached for a slender knife from the drawer. The man became hysterical. Mathias took a length of rope and helped tie him down. Then Tobias took to work. Mathias. Tobias. Slow cuts were made. Some were deep. Some were shallow. Some drew so much blood that I wanted to cover my hands in it and decorate the ship.
It was a massive vessel. It had taken twelve crewmembers to run it. The boys dispatched them fairly quickly. Plop. One fell overboard. Plop, plop. Two more until they were all gone except for the man and his wife. Then we gunned the ship and left their servants behind out in open sea. I wondered if we should have killed them first but I liked their screams. Their desperation made me envious. They loved life.
The remnants of blood were still visible on the wood in the cabin. Bloody footsteps streaked all along the aisle. Small bloody handprints lovingly adorned the ship. Those were mine.
The woman had been much more weepy but Mathias had taken care of her. In front of her husband, he tied her slowly to the bed. He whispered in her ear. I knew what he was saying. I closed my eyes and pretended Tobias was saying them to me. The woman only cried harder and louder but I whimpered in anticipated ecstasy. Mathias took of her clothes. She was beautiful. I was suddenly glad that it was not Tobias on that bed. I knew I would have been too jealous and would have torn through her like a harpie. But I could enjoy this.
Her husband had already been cut up by then. We had left him immobile on the floor, sitting up to watch his wife’s final performance. We did not gag him. The more sound, the better. Tobias, finished with his part of the job, went up top to take care of keeping us on course. My part was yet to come.
Mathias took the woman’s clothes off gently. As I watched, my eyes glazed over and suddenly it was me on that bed with Tobias looming over me. I clenched and unclenched my hands, reveling in the sharpness of the rope cutting into my wrists. Tobias smiled. He leaned down and kissed my cheekbone. He took a sharp knife and cut slits down my clothing. Then one by one, he peeled each piece off as though he was unwrapping a present. Slowly, carefully. He took in the sight and smiled.
Leaning into my ear, he whispered, “You’re so beautiful, baby. I’m going to touch you all over. It will feel wonderful. I’ll like it too. I promise. I know you’ll be good, like you should be.” I strained slightly against my restraints. He liked that. Then he lowered his mouth onto my nipple and sucked, softly at first then harder. I inadvertently arched up against him while at the same time trying to pull away. He lifted his head and then took the other nipple into his mouth.
The husband’s shouts tore me out of my daze. Tears streamed down his face to mix with the blood as he watched Mathias on top of his wife. But I saw a bulge in his pants and I knew. I laughed out loud and Mathias laughed too. Still, he didn’t take his eyes off of his prize. I stared off again and tried to reclaim my moment.
Tobias was on top of me. He looked back and drew a finger across my heaving chest. I couldn’t seem to breathe properly. Perhaps I was too excited. His finger trailed down, down, down. He found the juncture between my legs and I let out a whimper. My legs, bound in more rope so that I was spread-eagled on the bed, wriggled and writhed. Tobias held my face firmly in his hands and put his forehead against mine.
“I’ll make you like it,” he promised in a whisper. Then he plunged down. His tongue worked the hairless outer skin. It tickled and terrified me. Wetness seemed to drip out of me like water. Drip. Drip. Drip. He lapped it up thirstily. Then his tongue was inside me. It darted in and out slowly, tasting. I couldn’t help it. He was making me ready.
He lifted his head. His hard muscles contracted as he kneeled in front of me in all his naked glory. He was a splendid display of a man. He inched closer on his knees and positioned himself at my opening.
“Ready?” he asked. I shook my head a little, my eyes wide. Then he entered me with one long thrust. He was not a quiet one either. As soon as he was inside me, he let out a maniacal whoop. I cried out. It hurt. But I could not stop my movements. From afar, I looked to be struggling but it was only against my own inhibitions. I wanted to participate but the sight of him took my breath away. He pumped into me and out of me, each time returning with such force that I almost hit my head on the wall.
“Oh god, oh god, oh god,” he said over and over. “You’re so tight, my wonderful woman. My wonderful, my lovely. You like it, don’t you? Oh of course you do, yes. I know. I know. I know! How about this? Do you like this too?” He put his hands under me and lifted me up to match his thrust. I cried out as the ropes dug deeper into my skin but I couldn’t fight him. I wanted this.
More and more. He never seemed to tire. Finally, it happened. His face contorted and turned slightly red and he grit his teeth. Then he thrust into me one last time. I felt a warm liquid fill my insides. He released me and I fell onto the bed with his seed seeping out of me, little by little. I was exhausted. I coughed a little and whimpered mindlessly. My head rolled to one side.
“No! No! No!” The man pulled me out of my dream again. But I was satisfied. Sitting on the opposite bunk, watching Mathias with his new woman, I knew she felt the same too. Her husband sobbed angrily and tried to curse Mathias. The spit dripping from his mouth made him look mad. Mathias finally stood from the bed. Sweat glistened all over his body. He was magnificent. Still naked, he knelt by the husband and slapped him a little.
“Coward,” he spat. He considered the man’s face, torn and bruised and bloody. He leaned forward and licked his cheek. The man tried to pull away but he was too weak. A strange look came over Mathias’s face.
“Oh, you poor thing,” he said. “You must be so tired. But you know it will be all right now. You weren’t worthy of her, and now I’ll take care of her. You know that.” He gently brushed his fingers through the man’s bloody hair. “You can go now,” he said to him.
The man shook his head, words of denial forming on his lips.
“I’ll take good care of her and us. I promise. Her and us.” Mathias wrapped his big hands around the man’s neck and squeezed. Mathias’s new woman wriggled on the bed, perhaps in an attempt to stop Mathias. But I knew what she was really feeling. She had known a real man’s embrace now. Her movements were nothing more than an encouragement for Mathias, cheering him on to show the other poor man the final act of mercy. And he did. The man’s eyes rolled up into his head with a gag and he slumped to the ground.
That was how it had been. Now, three days later, I stared at Tobias’s back. I wanted him to take me like Mathias had taken that woman, the way I had imagined it. But he would not, probably. He would not take the woman either. She only belonged to one man now. I pulled myself out of my reverie, sighed and took my wet clothes off. Tobias looked up.
“What’s with you, mermaid?” he asked as he donned some of the other man’s clean clothes.
I simply looked at him and without a word, crawled into the bunk next to the bound form of the other woman. In a few minutes, I was asleep.
* * *
Tobias and Mathias were clever brothers. Within a few more weeks, they had completely changed the color of the ship and taken off down the coast. The name was different too. Something dry, simple, unmemorable. When we needed it, they anchored a mile off shore and I took the little rescue boat to small towns to get supplies. Food, clothing, medicine, blankets, more towels.
The weather was much warmer. I love June. It makes me think of tsunamis and fresh burials. Back on land, I would frequent the local graveyard to watch funerals. They were wonderful. It was then that people loved you best. I looked forward to my own.
Close to dinner-time, Mathias came into the kitchen of the ship. He was excited. Without saying a word, he nodded to us and turned back to the sleeping quarters. Tobias and I looked at each other, not having started our meals, and dashed from the table.
On one of the larger beds, Mathias’s new woman was grunting and breathing hard. The large swelling on top of her seemed about to bust. She cried out and leaned forward with her knees pulled up close to her. I grabbed several clean towels from the cabinet and dropped them beside her. Hot water. Perhaps some needles and thread, just in case. Mathias and Tobias stood back. It was their right. Tobias had gotten her to us and Mathias had worked tirelessly every day for the first month with her. This was my job now.
“Be careful, Maria,” Mathias warned. I gave him a sweet smile and kissed his cheek. Then I leaned in front of the woman.
“Be ready to push, now, you thing,” I said as nicely as I could. She screamed and gripped the sheets beneath her. It dawned on me that she looked so much more comfortable now with only the hand restraints.
I spread her legs hard and she cursed. I laughed and looked at Mathias. His face beamed with joy. Peering into her, I saw a hardness where softness should have been. I fingered it and she cringed.
“I think it’s coming!” I exclaimed. “Now, push!” She did as I said and the hardness came a little closer. “Push, I said!” and I slapped her knee. She pushed again.
She had been heaving like this for days now. Mathias had decided it was best to let the thing run its course. They aren’t very good when rushed.
“Push,” I commanded. “Again! Again! Again!” She pushed and pushed and finally exclaimed loudly. Then she leaned back against the bed again and a higher-pitched cry filled the room. I caught the bouncing thing in my hands and slapped it, just for fun. Putting it on the floor before me, I took a piece of string and tied off its chord. Then using the knife we had used on the woman’s old mate, I cut it. I was pleased to see there was still crusted blood on its hilt and edge. I handed the crier to my brother and Mathias lifted it in his arms.
“Hello, ugly nephew,” Tobias said. I felt proud of my little family and wondered then why I had ever thought to jump over in a storm. Shortly after, more fluids came out of the woman. But she was already asleep, tired after her job.
My brothers and I took the crier up to the top of the deck.
“What will you name him?” I asked Mathias.
“Jonas,” he said. I frowned but Tobias laughed out loud.
“He did come out of a whale!” Tobias shouted. He had always thought that Mathias’s new woman was too big for his taste. Mathias tossed the crier to me and proceeded to chase our brother around the top of the boat. Presently, I took the crier back down to Mathias’s woman, whom we had named Gladys. I forced Jonas to her breast and slapped her hand away when she tried to touch him. He did not belong to her, after all.
Her face was certainly strained. She was both disgusted and curious by the thing sucking heartily on her nipple, just as Mathias had done. She almost wanted to love it, I could tell. But that was not her job. When Jonas was finished, I wrapped him up and put him in the bathroom sink. He would not fall out of there. I went back to Gladys and sat beside her. She was still sweaty and bloody all over, partly from the birth and partly from her old husband.
I curled up beside her. “He’s fine. Very fine. Mathias is pleased,” I remarked. She said nothing so I went on. “Don’t worry, you won’t be alone long. We typically wait another month or so.”
She made an odd movement. “For what?” she asked.
“For another one, of course. Mathias won’t leave you alone for long. And when he’s not here, I’ll keep you company.” I leaned up and smiled at her. Then I growled and made a ferocious face. She cried out and pulled away. I laughed. She was so fun to tease.
“Maybe Tobias will give me one too,” I mused. She grimaced and I slapped her face. “I would certainly please my brother better than you pleased Mathias!” She said nothing but a tear slid down her face. I rolled my eyes. What a sack, I thought.
Bored, I got up and headed towards the top of the ship again where I could still hear my brothers running after each other. They were really children at heart.
“I hope you keep your milk up,” I said coldly over my shoulder, before I left her. “What with all of us, you’re going to need it.”
